Thursday, June 12, 2008

Rediscovering An Old Friend

Wow! Since my last post things have totally changed. My create-1-new-thing-every-day campaign has not only brought about a whole new range of creative projects, but it had totally changed ME!

It's so easy when your you're a mother of small kids to put yourself last. It's starts off being the right thing to do, as a babies needs are all about fulfilling the Now, and with great urgency. My 3 boys were each only 2 years apart, so i was either breastfeeding or pregnant for 6 years, constantly in a state of alertness to their needs, and cramming in my own things between nappy changes, comforting, and mood swings (theirs AND mine). Let lone sleeplessness...

Now my youngest is 3, and has recently become agreeable to negotiations, i realised just how highly-strung my day had become. Frantically hanging washing out in order to rush back inside to get back to the baby, it suddenly dawned on me that i didn't have a baby anymore, and that i could take my time, relax, and let my thoughts flow. I could get back in touch with ME again.

I'm not sure how i managed to cram in recording a couple of albums, shooting film-clips, writing soundtracks and songs, and a myriad of other project during these past few years (except to say that working from home is a blessing . I think a determination to trudge through the torrential downpours helped, but i also have come to believe that's it's more about just who i am, and how i am.

So my recent campaign has been more about giving myself permission to let go, and to find myself. To catch up to that place pre-family, where a day was more about immersing myself in the project than hanging washing and preparing 20 little meals every day.

I may not get to sleep-in much after 7am, and working into the wee hours just isn't gonna see me sane, but a little cuddle and a cute few words is all the inspiration i need these days to indulge in the creating of a masterpiece! Or at least an incredible achievement in the midst of chaos!